helloworld

2023-03-16 @ 13:48

i've been wanting to make some kind of online diary like this for a while. it's like, it's hard to journal in a place that is totally cut off from the world; on a piece of paper, in a digital journal etc. but i also don't like posting my thoughts directly to social media. the former feels too lonely, but maybe that's because i'm not validating my own emotions enough. the latter feels like, just by the nature of you posting on social media, that you're asking for interaction with it. i'm not, i have no real desire for people to interact with it, but there's something embarrassing that in the ui itself it demonstrate that people aren't interacting. by the fact that the tweet or post displays its interactions - likes, retweets etc., it looks like the op is looking for people to interact with it, and that they've 'failed' if there is a low number of interactions.

so i knew i wanted a webpage diary for a while. i know i need to record my thoughts just for the sake of clearing my very busy head, and its something my therapist has recommended. i hope that i can keep this online persona as anonymous as possible, though saying that feels like it's inviting failure. perhaps that's a light form of thrill seeking.